How I Wind Down & Relax Before Bed | Dealing with Anxiety at Night

As you may know if you’ve read my blog before (or if you know me in real life), I’m a bit of a worrier. I mean, that’s the understatement of the year to be honest, and we’re only 20 days in!

I’ve suffered with anxiety for a few years now and it’s always at its worse in the evenings. On a good day, my anxiety will start to materialise bit by bit (usually in the from of a stomach ache, feeling sick and/or jittery) as as it starts to get dark, on a bad day I often feel totally unable to cope with the amount of time I’m allowed to be left alone with my own thoughts during the evening.

This is why it has been essential for me to create a relaxing evening routine. I see my evening routine as a ritual, something I do every day to tell my brain that it’s time to settle down and to stop thinking about anything that might be stressing me out. And, so far, having a routine has really helped me.

Some days I do the bare minimum of this routine and sometimes I go all out, depending on how much time I have and how I feel that day. But I thought I’d go through the extended version of it with you step by step, in the hope that it might encourage or inspire you to find ways that you can wind down in the evening, especially if you struggle with them like I do.

I’d also like to point out that skincare is a really big part of how I wind down in the evening and I was actually going to include my skincare routine in this post. But, it’s fairly long and I wanted to go through it in detail so I’ve given it it’s own post, which you can read here if you’d like!

But here are the other ways in which I wind down in the evenings that I’d really recommend to everyone, whether you struggle with nights or not …

RE chocolate on the bedside table: if all else fails resort to something sweet and comforting i.e. your favourite chocolate

1. Relaxing Yoga and/or Meditation

I hope the suggestion of exercise before bed hasn't put you off already! The type of yoga I do before bed isn’t really exercise at all anyway. It’s mostly just lying down, usually with a pillow or blanket and focussing on my breathing, with a bit of easy stretching thrown in there. This is probably the step in my bedtime routine I skip the most due to laziness. But if I’m feeling really stressed or anxious before bed, I’ll always roll out my mat and take this time to myself. The only at home yoga practice I follow is Yoga With Adriene, who creates weekly yoga videos and is just brilliant. She has yoga for every mood but her bedtime yoga practices are particularly great.

Instead, or as well, as yoga, sometimes I do a little bit of meditation. It’s not something I’m totally convinced on as I often just sit there mentally-planning tomorrow’s to do list. But sometimes it does help me take some time for myself when I’ve had a busy/stressful day.

I’ve never done a meditation practice longer than 5 minutes because I’m almost sure I wouldn’t be able to get through a practice longer than that and I don’t want to make myself feel bad, so I stick to the 3-5 minute sessions. I use the app Headspace, although I don’t pay for it so I am very limited on my choice of practices. I would really recommend their beginners series though!

2. A Little Bit of Netflix

This is probably the one that I do manage every night! I’m not a big movie watcher but I LOVE a series. I think I like them because of the familiarity and comfort they provide and also because they’re usually only 30-60 minutes which is a lot more do-able and less intimidating than a 2 and a half hour film.

Anyway, I don’t need to tell you how good Netflix and TV is, you already know. I know the blue lights are supposed to be bad for sleep but, personally, I love the escapism TV provides before bed and it really allows me to get out of my own head and concentrate on something other than my own life. Some of my favourite escapist, easy-to-watch TV shows include Jane The Virgin, Crazy Ex Girlfriend and The Good Place, but there are many more.

3. Sleepy Candles

I was given a lavender candle just over a year ago as a Christmas present and since then, I will never go back. Burning a lavender (or any ‘sleepy’ smelling) candle before bed is so relaxing, not only because of the smell but because lighting a candle really feels like a ritual and a sensory reminder to your body that this is the time to relax.

I’m currently using this candle that I got for Christmas and I also have a This Works one ready and waiting to go, which is very exciting!

4. Some One on One Time with My Current Book of Choice

Even for people who don’t particularly like reading, I think reading before bed is something everyone should try! It might work, similarly to Netflix, in that it allows you to escape your own world, or it might work that you’re so bored you fall asleep. I choose to read before bed because of the former reason but whatever works for you is good!

Sometimes I read 2 pages before bed, sometimes I give myself an hour and read 40- it just depends how I’m feeling and how much university-related reading I’ve already done that day. The book I’m reading in these photos is Refinery29’s Money Diaries, which is all about how to sort your finances out. It’s not exactly the most relaxing book to read before bed, but sometimes because it’s slower it helps me to fall asleep. Plus, I only really like reading one book (for fun) at a time so I just read whatever I’m currently reading before bed. If you’re really struggling with reading, I have a blog post all about how to get back into it.

5. Pillow Spray the Day Away

Finally, we have my ultimate nightly ritual, the pillow spray! I’ve been skeptical of the humble pillow spray before, but after trying it, I don’t think I could ever go back. I use the This Works Deep Sleep Pillow Spray, which smells like a dream. It’s not really the smell that helps me relax though, it’s the ritual of spraying it and telling my body ‘it’s time to relax and sleep now’, much like the candles.

I sometimes use a de-stressing roller ball too if I feel like I need it. I like the This Works one and the Liberty one that they created in partnership with Aromatherapy. I also like doing a face mask before bed. They don’t even have to have a ‘sleepy smell’, I just find them super relaxing, even if it is a cliche. I talk a little bit more about this in my evening skincare routine blog post.

I hope you’re feeling inspired to have a relaxing evening tonight! If you’re reading this on a Sunday, which is when it’s going up, tonight is such a good time to carve out some time to relax and set yourself up for a great week. The time is so worth it as it will do wonders for your mental health, your quality of your sleep and therefore your happiness and productivity levels! If it’s not Sunday, start tonight anyway, I really hope an evening routine helps you as much as it has helped me!

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My Evening Skincare Routine (Cruelty Free)

Some links used in this post are affiliate which means I earn a small amount of commission if you purchase an item after clicking on my link.

I LOVE skincare. I’m crap at make up and often find it a bit of a hassle but I could lather lotions and potions all over my face (and neck, you don’t want a wrinkly spotty neck!!!) all day long. I shared my morning skincare and beauty routine a while back but I’ve been waiting to share my evening skincare routine on the blog until I got it down to a tee. I wouldn’t say I’m 100% there yet but I’ve definitely found some products I love and that work that I want to share with you. Sometimes I do all of this routine and sometimes I literally just take my make up off if that’s all I can be bothered with. But I think that’s why I love it so much, even if it’s just taking my make-up off, it ensures that there’s a little bit of me time every day!

I have oily-ish skin and used to suffer with acne throughout my teens but it’s not as bad nowadays. I still get spots during my time of the month and my skin is by no means clear. So I tend to focus on products that are aimed at people with oily skin and ‘detoxifying’ products, as that’s what I think my skin needs. But I’m not as strict nowadays and my skin can handle a little more oil than it used to be able to. Also, no I do not use a moisturiser in the evening. My morning routine is fairly focussed on hydrating so I like to allow my skincare one to deal with the oil and the spots and I just don’t feel as though using a moisturiser is helpful or necessary in dealing with that!

FYI: Everything in this skincare routine is cruelty free apart from the Garner Micellar Water, which I bought by accident thinking it was. I have still put a * next to all the products which are cruelty free just for confirmation.

I always start with a micellar water to take my make-up off, if I’m wearing it. At the moment I’m just using the Garnier Micellar Water as it’s cheap and the bottle is huge but my favourite micellar water is the Yes To Tomatoes Cleansing Water*, as it’s targeted towards breakout-prone skin. I’ll definitely be repurchasing this when the Garner runs out as not only is it effective in keeping my oily skin at bay but the applicator is just SO good.

Next, I move on to cleanser, to make sure all of my make up is off and to remove any dirt and oils that my skin has collected throughout the day. I’ve been using the Mario Badescu Enzyme Cleansing Gel* for about a year, which I like but I don’t LOVE. In the last month I’ve switched to using the Dermalogica Special Cleansing Gel*, which I think I prefer. They’re both super simple cleansers but the Dermalogica one just feels as though its doing a bit more, although the Mario Badescu smells better, so it depends what you’re after really! I’ll use one of these cleansers if I’m feeling a bit lazy or if I’m going to put a face mask on. If not, I’ve been using Lixirskin’s Electrogel Cleanser* which is a 2in1 cleanser/mask. After wetting your skin you apply it and leave it on for a couple of minutes- I leave it whilst brushing my teeth- then wash it off. It stings a little at first but I like that as it suggests it’s actually doing something and the appearance of my skin is slightly improved after taking it off. Plus, the packaging is v. cute.

This is the point in my skincare routine where I’ll use a face mask if I’m going to do so, although I only do this around once or twice a week as I’m usually too lazy. My current favourite is The Body Shop’s Himalayan Charcoal Purifying Glow Mask*. Again, it stings a little but I notice an immediate difference in my skin every time after using it- it really does help to detoxify your skin and add a little bit of glow. It’s GREAT if you have an event coming up the next day.

If I’m not using a face mask, which is the case most nights, after cleansing I’ll use a toner. Again, I’ve been using Mario Badescu’s Special Cucumber Lotion* for about a year but I’m not besotted with it. I’ve recently been trying the cult classic, Pixi Glow Tonic*, which I’ve used before and wasn’t fussed on. But that was when my acne and oily-skin levels were much worse and my skincare priorities were very different so I’m open-minded. I think I feel least secure in this part of my skincare routine but I do like using a toner so if anyone can recommend a really good one that would be great!

Finally, I use my no.1, can’t-live-without-it product which is The Ordinary’s Salicylic Acid*. This has SAVED my skin. I apply it all over my face, just with my fingers, every night, without fail. Or, if I have a spot I’ll apply it straight on to that and it’s appearance has reduced by at least 70% by the next day. If you suffer with mild acne, I can’t recommend this enough! It’s my skin saviour and I always break out even if I forget to use it for only a few days. Plus, it’s cheap as chips!

PSA: THIS IS ME APPLYING MICELLAR WATER TO MY EYES, NOT ACID. PLEASE DO NOT MISINTERPRET THIS AND TRY AND RECREATE WHAT I AM DOING. DO NOT PUT ACID IN YOUR EYES!!!

I hope you’ve enjoyed this post! I’d love to hear all about your skincare routine in the comments? Do you even have one? Some of the people with the best skin I know use nothing more than a face wipe so I’m always really interested! I put my skincare routine into place to improve my skin obviously, but what I have really loved about it is that it provides some sense of routine for me every night, at university, at home, wherever I am! In next week’s post, I’m going to be talking about the other ways I wind down in the evenings. So I’ll see you back here, same time, same place, next Sunday for that! Oh and there might be a cheeky extra birthday-themed blog post as I turn 20 mid-week too…

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